Is it really found family if half of them were enemies and the other half are morally compromised? Yes. Preorder Humans Don’t Have Horns to meet them.
Like many, I was raised on the saying “blood is thicker than water.” While that’s an appealing idea, life has taught me that sometimes, choice can be thicker than blood. Which is probably why Found family is one of my favorite tropes.
Chances are you’ve enjoyed at least one story built on a “found family“ – from Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy team to classic like Lord of the Rings. This trope, also known as family of choice or chosen family, centers on characters who aren’t biologically related but bond like family through trust and shared trials. Instead of being bound by blood, they choose each other – ultimately forming a support system often thicker than blood, by choice rather than obligation.
Origins and Cultural Context
The concept of assembling a surrogate family has been around in storytelling for ages. Consider The Three Musketeers (1844) or Dorothy’s motley crew in The Wizard of Oz (1900) or the Fellowship in Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings – none of these characters are kin by blood, yet they form deeply loyal, quasi-familial groups.
However, the term “found family” itself gained popularity more recently. It evolved alongside the idea of “family of choice,” a concept that became prominent in LGBTQ+ communities in the late 20th century. Anthropologist Kath Weston famously documented queer “chosen families” in her 1991 book Families We Choose, effectively coining that term.
The appeal is universal: not everyone has a supportive blood-family, so these stories celebrate the families you create.
Found Family in the Romance Genre
In the romance genre, the found family trope adds an extra layer of heart. Romance novels don’t only give us two people falling in love; they often surround the couple with a close-knit circle of friends or community that feels like family. Think of the small-town romance where the entire town becomes an extended family, or a spicy contemporary romance series where each friend in a girl squad (or guy squad) eventually finds their own love. Those friend groups provide unwavering support, comic relief, and a sense of belonging that highlights the story’s warmth. In many romances, the message is that the right partner isn’t the only person who can heal or complete you – a found family of friends can do the same by cheering you on and calling you out when needed. A great example is Binding 13. Shannon doesn’t just fall in love with Johnny, she’s slowly surrounded by people who protect her like she’s theirs. Gibsie, Claire and Lizzie aren’t perfect, but they show up. Again and again.
Found Family in Romantasy
In high-stakes magical worlds, having trusted comrades by your side often means the difference between survival and doom. Thus, many epic adventures weave in a found family alongside the central love story, giving the hero and heroine more to fight for than just each other.
“In romantasy fiction, these connections often emerge alongside a central romance, adding emotional depth and high-stakes tension. Our heroes aren’t just fighting for love -they’re fighting for the people who finally made them feel seen, safe, and chosen.” Josephine Lamont
Take the works of Sarah J. Maas, the queen of romantasy. Maas excels at creating ensembles of characters that feel like a family readers themselves dream of being part of. In A Court of Thorns and Roses, Feyre enters the dangerous fae realm and not only finds her soulmate, but also finds true family in the Night Court. The loyalty, love, and camaraderie among Rhysand’s inner circle – a band of warriors and misfits who would die for each other is essential to the world building.
Maas’s Throne of Glass series similarly evolves from a lone assassin to a Court of Terrasen filled with friends-turned-family. Readers come for the courtly intrigue and steamy romances, but stay for the tight-knit group of ride-or-die companions who banter, bicker, and battle together.
In Crescent City, Bryce Quinlan starts off surrounded by vibrant friends, but the story rips that comfort away early on. What unfolds is a slow, devastating, and deeply satisfying build of a new kind of family – one forged through grief, loyalty, and shared trauma. It’s not about who’s blood or even who’s romantic – it’s about who shows up when everything breaks.
In Guild by Raven Kennedy, the heroine begins in captivity and isolation, but over the course of the series, she collects a deeply loyal group of allies who care for her, challenge her, and ultimately help her reclaim her agency. The bond they share is hard-won and born from trauma, but it transforms into something empowering – a chosen family forged in rebellion and love.
Why We Crave These Families
Why do readers (and viewers) adore the found family trope, especially in romantasy? In part, it fulfills a deep emotional need. A great found family story shows that even if a character’s past was full of loneliness or trauma, their future can shine with people who choose them and love them unconditionally. Psychologically, this resonates because humans all crave connection and a sense of home. Found family plots often take characters from isolation to belonging, and that journey hits us right in the feels every time.
Found Family in Humans Don’t Have Horns
As much as I love reading this trope, I loved writing it even more. Humans Don’t Have Horns is a dark romantasy packed with trauma healing, enemies-to-lovers, and found family elements.
The found family forming around Lian isn’t just handed to her because she has a romantic connection. Daton’s trust doesn’t automatically grant her a place in his world. She has to earn it, and with some it is more of a challenging task. But that hard-earned loyalty makes it even more meaningful. Hopefully, that’s not too spoilery. I’m trying!
And this is just the beginning. Since Humans Don’t Have Horns is the first in a trilogy, I can already feel how this family will grow in future books – with more bonds forged, and more found kin who choose each other through fire and blood.
Which is your favorite found family of all time?
I read these articles while researching this post, and you’re welcome to dive in:
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Meg Rady, “History & Popularity of the Found Family Trope,” Pub Club Online (Emerson College).
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Cass Fong, “A Deep Dive Into Tropes: Found Family,” The Indiependent (July 16, 2025).
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Estefanía Vélez, “Found Family: Literature That Celebrates Families of Choice,” NYPL Blogs (Dec 9, 2020).
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Josephine Lamont, “What Makes Found Family So Unforgettable in Romantasy Fiction?” (May 3, 2025).
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Minka Guides, “Beyond biology: embracing your chosen family” (Dec 10, 2022).
